By Eduardo
I need the Amigos to help me out with a few things I’ve been trying to figure out for a while:
- Why are there so many bead stores out there?
- How does a bead store stay in business if they’re selling… just… beads? It seems that this would be nearly impossible. Is something else going on at these places?
- WHO BUYS BEADS?!?
Seriously, I’m wondering if I’m missing something here. Are bead stores where people go to secretly buy drugs or something? I’m starting to get the feeling that this is the case, and that I’m just naive for not already knowing that. It could be that my first question above only applies to the area where I currently live, which makes me even more convinced that bead stores are somehow drug-related. I remember there being many stories about The Beadman in Redding, where local high school kids went to buy illicit substances and drug paraphernalia in their “back room” – so this theory doesn’t seem all that far-fetched. I know there are obviously people that make jewelry, and they need to buy beads occasionally. I just don’t see that tiny fraction of the population keeping all these bead stores afloat financially, all by themselves.
This evening as Mrs. Eduardo and I were out on Highway 116, we saw a bunch of roadside signs advertising BEADS!!! at some place up ahead. I’ve noticed that there is often a sense of urgency in bead advertising. There are almost always exclamation points in anything advertising beads, so this is also somewhat interesting. Maybe bead merchants are totally legit, and just really desperate… Even the Beadman’s gotta eat.
Come on, Amigos – help me out here. let me know what you think.
By Eduardo
About ten years ago, I had a terrifying nightmare in which I was attacked by a giant mosquito that had a cat’s head. I won’t get into that now, but I may post about it sometime in the future before we move on to the next topic. Needless to say, it left me scarred.
Now, I don’t know if it was because I mentioned it while commenting on Paco’s dream the other day, or if it’s because our house seems to be full of mosquito hawks right now, but something summoned the same horror from my subconscious recently.
A couple of nights ago, I dreamed that my wife and I lived in an alternate version of the house we’re in now. There was a nice pool in the backyard, with a small cabana/storage shed type thing in the back corner of the yard.
It was a Saturday, and I was about to do some yard work when I opened the shed door to get some tools or something. After I’d stepped inside, I heard a creepy rustling sound that gradually rose in frequency to a low vibrating buzz. The hairs on my neck rose, and as I instinctively retreated from the shed I saw something rise up from the floor and slowly start flying toward me. I just about lost it when I saw that it was a huge, hairy mosquito with a wingspan of about three feet. Actually, it was probably a mosquito hawk… Maybe less threatening in one sense, but still unspeakably hideous at that size.
To my surprise and relief, the thing flew past me after hovering there for a few seconds. I remember being more grossed out than scared, because it was all hairy and nasty-looking just like those frightening bug photos taken with scanning electron microscopes.
Anyway, after it flew past me it headed for our front yard. I followed cautiously, and interestingly enough found our friend and fellow amigo Pecos standing there. We smiled and greeted each other, since it actually has been a long time since we’ve seen one another. I think at that point the giant mosquito buzzed over to us, and Pecos said something like, “oh, THERE you are. I’ve been waiting here long anough!”
Then, right before my eyes, the mosquito morphed into a woman!
I just about fainted as the giant hairy insect shapeshifted into a perfectly normal, ordinary woman – fully clothed, with purse and everything. She just stood there next to Pecos, smiling. He went on to explain that they had recently gotten engaged, which I thought was weird given the fact he is already married.
“Oh, yeah – it HAS been a long time since I last saw you, hasn’t it?” he said. He continued explaining how it all came together, but I still didn’t understand what was going on. I was still a little troubled over the fact that the lady standing in front of me was actually a giant insect that lived in our shed.
For some reason I decided to take a picture of them, so I pulled out my phone. Pecos started making fun of me for having an iPhone, and I think I woke up after that.
By admin
And now, a special public service announcement from Mis Amigos Locos:
Please note that some content on this site is now considered ‘private’… That is, certain posts are only visible to the official Amigos (when logged in). As we start getting more traffic on the site, it’s become obvious that certain posts and categories need to be censored from public viewing. If you have any questions on this, just ask Eduardo or Jaime. If you are a contributor to this site, make sure you log in before doing anything here – even reading old posts – because certain things won’t even show up if you don’t. A lot of older entries will be invisible if you aren’t logged in.
To the rest of you, this is why it may occasionally appear that certain posts are missing here. We’ve got them in the system, it’s just that they’re not 100% suitable for public consumption for various reasons. We hope you understand. Pretty much all content from here on out will be public, so this mainly applies to older posts.
Thanks!
By Jaimenacho
It didn’t take too long from the time the amigos started posting random dreams for me to have one of my own. Here it is…
I was on a photography outing with my friend Stephen and we were going to be photographing for several weeks in a coastal area….the weather was pretty miserable and Stephen turns to me and says,
“I’m going to time machine out of here…find some better weather.”
With that he leaves…and I walk around for an unknown period of time…but in my head I seem to recall it being about 5 days…before I decided that I too was going to take this time machine somewhere else.
I found the machine almost instantly…because it was a dream…and my brain decided I didn’t need to focus on searching for the machine.
I opened the hatch, and crawled in. The whole thing resembled the inside of a rocket….very cylindrical…and narrow. There were some pillows inside for comfort…and the interior was a very bright variety of orange tones. At the far end of the machine was a screen…and two buttons. One button was for entering specific location and time. The other button was for a randomly selected time.
My mind was fearful that if I selected the ’random’ time…I would end up jousting knights, or fighting with a T-Rex….but I still picked it…and sat back to wait….because instantly after pressing the button I knew I was going somewhere safe….even if I didn’t know where.
The transportation process was random. It was a mix of slow-motion-blurred orange colors, and the sounds of Foreigner. I was during this sequence I realized I was dreaming…and thought….’wow how bizarre my mind picked Foreigner of all the bands It could’ve selected to play during this transition.’ I can’t remember exactly what song played…but it was pretty awesome, and strangely fitting for the circumstances.
Eventually I landed, opened the hatch and found myself in the middle of a field area that very much resembled a French countryside circa WWII. It was cold…and I was dressed in military type clothing…but it was all orange. I had a gun…and up ahead there were a few other people I knew were part of my battalion by the orange camouflage clothing they had. They greeted me and we walked down this country road a bit on patrol. I can’t recall the conversation we had but at one point we walked by a house that was very much modern, and didn’t fit in.
“I think the girls are having a slumber party…” one of my soldier friends said.
“Cool…let’s go.” responded another.
The next scene I was walking in this giant house, which was very white, and lacked any real color on the walls. I was looking for my comrades and wondering how we ended up in this weird home.
After some wandering I found the other soldiers sitting in a giant living room watching movies with some girls…they were all covered up in blankets, and sitting on bean bag chairs.
I was about to scold them for letting their civic duties slide…because we were obviously supposed to be on patrol…not watching teen movies in someone’s house. but I woke up.
By Eduardo
One of my wife’s relatives lives right around the corner from Tom Hanks in Pacific Palisades. Here’s a shot of his house I took while on a stroll through the neighborhood the other night. Thankfully, he didn’t run out and pull a Sean Penn on me.
By Jaimenacho
I’ve posted a lot of information on why my job, and the people I deal with on a daily basis suck the ever-lovin’ life from my body…but it has reached a new lows.
I always play music in my class. Not so much for their enjoyment…but for my sanity.
I was listening to Ennio Morricone this morning….and one of the students busts out,
“HEY….this is METALLICA!”
followed by another…
“YEAH….cool! it IS Metallica!”
I of course, won’t sit there and let this go down….
“No…you’re BOTH wrong. It’s NOT Metallica.”
“YES it is how much do you want to bet!” One of them cries.
“I’ll bet too…another adds.”
“You pick the amount…” I say…”You’re BOTH WRONG….it’s Ennio Morricone.”
“NO it’s Ecstasy of Gold…from Metallica.” A kid snaps in reply.
“It IS Ecstasy of Gold….you’re right there…but Metallica had NOTHING to do with the composition of this song….it’s Ennio Morricone…yes they USED it as an intro song to their lame ass live CD…but it’s not their tune.”
It took only a few seconds after that before they went back to their seats. Silent.
By Paco
Ok, this dream was from a few weeks ago. Not only was it extremely odd, but it was also quite long and detailed.
I had arrived in New York City somehow and was by myself. I was making my way down a street, and quickly found out that I was in a very shady neighborhood. It was dark, and there were bad folks all over the place. Eventually I made my way to a street corner where there were odd ball people all over, and one business that was lit and looked like a real establishment. It was an internet cafe, and for some reason at that point, I needed to go in and find my hotel. (for some strange reason, it was then that I found out that I had a hotel in NYC) So, I made my way through the riff raff, pimps, drug deals, and other weirdos and walked up to the front door. Right before I got to the front, I noticed something very large laying in the curb. I almost stepped on it, and looked down and noticed a large dead and bloody dairy cow.
“$&#*@!” I screamed as I barely missed it. I gagged slightly, turned away, and made my way into the cafe.
Once I got in, I made my way to a computer, and after a while I was able to find my hotel. It took longer than I thought, because the computer wouldn’t work right. (things like this always happen when I am trying to find something in my dreams…) But I knew if I could access my email, I could find the name and address of my hotel. Finally I was able to get it, I thanked the clerk, paid him, and made my way out of the cafe.
It was then that I noticed my dog walk in. (He’s a black lab in case you haven’t met him…) He was very happy to see me, but he also had a lot of blood all over his coat.
Crap I thought, he was messing with the dead cow!
I took me a second to realize that he was OK, but eventually I decided he was fine, so I made my way out to the street to get to the hotel.
At this point I also left my dog behind… why??? I don’t know… it’s a dream. I would never had done this in real life.
I didn’t take me long to find a bus, it was one of those huge double decker tourist buses. This one though had no roof, so people could sit on the top and get a great view of the city. I got on board, and asked the driver if he could take me to my hotel. He said he could, and told me to hop aboard.
So I made my way to the top of the bus, road along, and watched the city pass by. We were heading to the water, and eventually got to an area where there were numerous docks and casinos.
Yes… in my dream New York, there are casinos.
The bus driver stopped at one of the casinos, and said over the load speaker that my hotel was near this stop too.
So I made my way off the bus, and looked around. My hotel was nowhere to be found. I kept looking for a few minutes, and then finally made my way into one of the casinos to find someone to ask as to the whereabouts of my hotel. I made my way in, wandered around and looked at the casino floor, it wasn’t all that big, was pretty well spread out. After a little wandering I eventually tracked a male employee down and asked him where to go.
He told me he knew where my hotel was, and to follow him. I walked behind him towards the back of the casino, and he guided me to a door, opened it, and escorted me in.
“I’ll be back in a second and tell you where to go, wait in here please.”
“Ok” I said.
He shut the door behind me, and locked it. And I immediately got a sense of panic. What the hell was I doing in here? Where did this guy go? Why did he lock me in here? I quickly glanced around, found a back door, and made my way over to it. I checked the knob, and it wasn’t locked. Weird I thought, why would he lock me in here, but not lock the back door? I didn’t think about it long, and quickly vacated the premises. I’d figure out where my place was some other way.
I exited the door, and made my way towards the street. There were people all over the place, a lot of them seemed to be going to and from work on the docks, or to the casino. I walked around for a few minutes, and after a little while I found my casino. I checked in, and then went back outside.
When I got outside, I made my way to a taxi. This taxi was also like the bus I had road earlier, it had no roof. It was also quite long, and held at least a dozen people.
Now this part get stretchy in my memory, but I remember getting on the taxi, and eventually the driver drove us down the docks. After a short moment, he drove into the water.
Then I woke up… it was over.
And this was one for MAL.
